Thursday, August 20, 2009

Angry

That is what I am right now so if you want to skip this post feel free.
Tonight I had to comfort my sweet boy on the subject of suicide. Hello he is only 12-still a baby!
Parenting in itself is hard but dang this was hard. He just cried and cried and cried and all I could do was hold him. I am so mad-I know that I shouldn't be but that is how I feel. I have been praying about my anger to God and I know He knows but I have to tell him.
My son wants to go to the funeral but I am having mixed feelings. The only funeral he has ever been at was my mom's 4 years ago and truthfully I don't know if I want to take him since I haven't been to a funeral since then to and I don't know if I am ready! If you have made it this far-please if you think about it I could use some prayers.
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5 comments:

Conny said...

I'm so sorry for Lil' Lonnie ... and you. That's a sad conversation to have to have at that age :( There are 4 siblings in our school whose dad committed suicide about 3 years ago - it just seems so unfair & so selfish on his part :( I hope you all find some peace with this. The funeral might be closure if you choose to let him go?????

Blessed Beyond said...

I will be praying for yall!
Hugs and Blessings,

Rebekah said...

Wow- that is difficult. I'm guessing it was a classmate of his? Taking him might be good closure for him- but I totally understand about your feelings concerning your mom.
I'll be praying

♥luvin♥this♥life♥ said...

sigh... Poor kiddo! I hope and pray that your words helped offer him insight and comfort, and gave him a bit of wisdom beyond his young years to be able to withstand that particular temptation if ever he is faced with it or if he knows another person who succumbs to it. I battled with those thoughts as a teen.. barely gripping my faith.. reciting my life verse over and over as I cried thousands of bitter and self-loathing tears. Today, I cannot explain why I felt such hopelessness, but it was so very real then, and I KNEW I could not turn to my parents for answers to my questions and doubts. Thank God that you are a Mom he can talk to, and I pray that if ever he is on the inside of that temptation that he can still talk to you. My heart goes out to both of you! Loves ya, Lady!

De'Etta @ Choosing Joy said...

Oh, Bobbie Jo, praying here.

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